Thursday, June 9, 2011

A Leg Up - Thermoregulation

I've seen the issue come up lately and wanted to say my two cents on the matter.  Being Manly did an excellent post on men's shorts over a year ago.  When considering looks alone, pants claim the trophy.  Exculpatory factors do exist in my world.  Respectfully, I must disagree with my The Rt. Hon. Vir Beatum and the conclusion most make, which is to not wear shorts.  The arguments for the aesthetically disagreeable nature of shorts by comparison to long trousers are quite accurate.  Also, one must wear shorts correctly, taking into account time and place.  I prefer the look of a woman's legs to any man's.  Having said that, compliments have been extended on my own legs by members of the opposite sex (and come to think of it, one awkwardly memorable comment from male friend).  So then, were these ladies being polite or do women find men in shorts attractive?

In short, much of my life has been spent in the dreary cold climates of the middle Western states of America.  Yes, I wore shorts as a boy, even suits with shorts.  My blood is of Irish, German and French lineage.  The Irish being the vast majority must have something to do with my personal thermometer - as it is always ready for a cold and damp climate.  I'm very nearly perennially excessively warm, even when others are chattering their pearly whites and fighting to keep extremities from hypothermia.  Perhaps this make me exothermic? In any case, I endeavor to keep from perspiring without added external variables like weather.

For undergraduate studies, New Orleans was my home.  More sweltering places are few and far between.  Yes, here I frequented the Bermuda as was the necessary convention to beat the heat.  Frequently, oppressive humidity and heat taught me great love for the short.

Today, I am settled in the District, formerly swamp land, with all due tropical meteorological significances. It is once again necessary don the short pants for sake of thermoregulation.  When on days like today the temperature approaches triple digits with similar figures of humidity, the short is a savior.

Length is an entirely problematic.  These days the term shorts seems to be a misnomer...

These are not short.  Equally problematic are the too short shorts...

This really flatters no man.  Then again I wont be telling these Gents to bare less leg...

Navy SEALs at Buds from Valet Mag

 Tom Selleck as Magnum PI, the character was a Navy SEAL 

Then again:
As Bond could wear just about anything (from here)

These are perfectly acceptable forms or resort wear in my opinion, but let's keep this length for destination holidays.  As for the adequate length, shorts should sit above your knee when standing while concealing your undergarments, especially when sitting.  Evidently, Mr. Selleck makes the cut.  The fit should be close to the body so as not to sag off the frame.  See below for length and fit.

My personal choice from J.CREW

JFK and Jackie (from here)

I resolve to wear shorts, of proper length, at the proper time and with the proper majesty.  Ideally, few will notice I have them on if I've played my part well.



  1. Thanks for the mention. I concur with your final sentiment. No rule is absolute, and that goes for shorts too. A man of elegant style will find a way to air his nether man while retaining his dignity. I have no doubt that you pull it off.

  2. VB-
    I couldn't agree more. Thank you, sir, for the quick read! You are quite on top of things.

  3. Men should never wear capri pants... or cargo shorts(unless you're going fishing).

    As someone that wears shorts a lot(almost year 'round and I wear them to work most days), it's still possible to look nice and not be wearing long pants. My newest favorite short is the PC short from Southern Proper. Still hard to find a 5" inseam that looks good!

  4. Nick-
    It's a necessary part of life in the South. 5" is a little short for me personally, but J.CREW sells them also.

  5. nice article,keep sharing. some of the best mens shorts available here.mens capri online



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